pure
time seems to fly fast, felt like ages for some reason. soaked up in sweat everyday in camp actually helps … maybe i just got used to being alone? heh anyway, time to return to my second home. til im out and have the mood…
Mighty Me Maybe
Turns out life just doesn’t work the way you like, wait I thought I knew this already. Enough of self delusion, I have come to accept the terms and conditions of the contract called Love, somewhere in its mini clauses, theres a tricky part which requires both parties to be mutually attracted. Oh well so I knew it all along, whats the problem with making life more positive … or should I say desperately extending my period of happiness. Not that i’m not happy now or anything, but oh well I can only suck it up.
I always said my life in Army was alright, not too bad, quite tiring but still bearable. Not until this week, Exercise Falcon 2 showed me what I was in for, long and timeless trekking in the dark night, walking to our objective never felt so tiring in my life. And the load I had to carry is just wtfgg. 2 Missions in 3 days, barely enough rest and definitely any uninterrupted sleep. But somewhere along the lines of this life of No-Life, I managed to find a sense of satisfaction and pride.
Taiwan, Brunei, 2NTM, Thailand, it all helped to ease the fact that I will be going no where with a girlfriend, or at least even if i tried and failed, I’d know why. It’s no surprise to me that my life this year will be lonely, and my rifle will really be my wife, I will cherish her with my life in the days to come lawl …
time to let it all out
its part of life to feel sad, emotional and painful. but ill get stronger each time.
Last Entry
Heh, I know that I said I wont blog anymore, but it doesn’t seem like there was a closure to the events in my life. With that said, anyone who finds themselves here because they cant decipher whats going on in my life will probably understand.
It’s been a long time, since I felt free. Can’t say im unhappy, but neither am I happy. But in my earnest dreams to make myself contented with someone, I overlooked the fact that some people are already enjoying their lives as it is, this is something I don’t want to disrupt and will not intrude. The world doesn’t revolve around me and so … isn’t it time to just say good bye =)
I’m taking a break.
Wont be blogging in awhile ;) sorry guys. Just that I’ve got a lot in my head and i’m confused.
anyway, just entered 1st commando battalion. maybe ill be back after brunei or my 72km or maybe earlier ;D who knows haha.
good bye ;)
24/12/08
happiest christmas eve ever. it was not because of what or where.
its was just simply who ;)
Tired
Danzation was a blast, yet i am very tired now. every thought of my arrangement pisses me off. what i wanted to do, i couldn’t. what i need to, i haven’t.
sorry eh =) looks like i cant live to my promises.
and it just hurts to know that i haven’t gotten over you.
such a drag … oh well guard duty later. waking up at 6. going to be a zombie.
but i chose to do it anyway
gnite folks
NIGHTNIGHT by DEDDY
