pure
time seems to fly fast, felt like ages for some reason. soaked up in sweat everyday in camp actually helps … maybe i just got used to being alone? heh anyway, time to return to my second home. til im out and have the mood…
Mighty Me Maybe
Turns out life just doesn’t work the way you like, wait I thought I knew this already. Enough of self delusion, I have come to accept the terms and conditions of the contract called Love, somewhere in its mini clauses, theres a tricky part which requires both parties to be mutually attracted. Oh well so I knew it all along, whats the problem with making life more positive … or should I say desperately extending my period of happiness. Not that i’m not happy now or anything, but oh well I can only suck it up.
I always said my life in Army was alright, not too bad, quite tiring but still bearable. Not until this week, Exercise Falcon 2 showed me what I was in for, long and timeless trekking in the dark night, walking to our objective never felt so tiring in my life. And the load I had to carry is just wtfgg. 2 Missions in 3 days, barely enough rest and definitely any uninterrupted sleep. But somewhere along the lines of this life of No-Life, I managed to find a sense of satisfaction and pride.
Taiwan, Brunei, 2NTM, Thailand, it all helped to ease the fact that I will be going no where with a girlfriend, or at least even if i tried and failed, I’d know why. It’s no surprise to me that my life this year will be lonely, and my rifle will really be my wife, I will cherish her with my life in the days to come lawl …
time to let it all out
its part of life to feel sad, emotional and painful. but ill get stronger each time.
Last Entry
Heh, I know that I said I wont blog anymore, but it doesn’t seem like there was a closure to the events in my life. With that said, anyone who finds themselves here because they cant decipher whats going on in my life will probably understand.
It’s been a long time, since I felt free. Can’t say im unhappy, but neither am I happy. But in my earnest dreams to make myself contented with someone, I overlooked the fact that some people are already enjoying their lives as it is, this is something I don’t want to disrupt and will not intrude. The world doesn’t revolve around me and so … isn’t it time to just say good bye =)
I’m taking a break.
Wont be blogging in awhile ;) sorry guys. Just that I’ve got a lot in my head and i’m confused.
anyway, just entered 1st commando battalion. maybe ill be back after brunei or my 72km or maybe earlier ;D who knows haha.
good bye ;)
24/12/08
happiest christmas eve ever. it was not because of what or where.
its was just simply who ;)
Tired
Danzation was a blast, yet i am very tired now. every thought of my arrangement pisses me off. what i wanted to do, i couldn’t. what i need to, i haven’t.
sorry eh =) looks like i cant live to my promises.
and it just hurts to know that i haven’t gotten over you.
such a drag … oh well guard duty later. waking up at 6. going to be a zombie.
but i chose to do it anyway
gnite folks
Blue Chips on the table
Christmas seems busier for me, and it only hit me this weekend when I decided that I had alot of things to accomplish in this 3 weeks which I am not going to be doing anything in camp. This is firstly because of my ankle, which first and foremost is still injured ;s and secondly my fitness which deteriorated in the process of healing it.
Well, anyway, I have been searching for Glass Bottle sellers online and its going no where, I will go find them in shops if I have to. Anyone knows where good? Those Vodka looking bottles, but i want them CLEAR ;) like stainless and frostless =P
ALSO, I am thinking of finding part-time star folders. HAHA anyone who gets my drift can call me. I reckon i’d have enough time to fold thousands on my own though ;)
All this for a christmas gift, then again its not the first time im this zealous when it comes to making people happy heh.
Finally over,
Medic course had finally ended, and the joys and pain of being in Nee Soon will be remembered, the friends made there and the experiences shared in the 8 weeks. Learning new skills and having a new set of responsibilities marked a new chapter in my life as a Medic, but another part of me changed as my ankle starts to recover, running and jumping dont seem to affect me that much now, and i am slowly picking up my momentum in training once again.
I am excited to what is in store for me, I want to excel, I want to work hard, and of course, I want to be the best. Yes I know there are times it is so difficult to hold on and to maintain, but as I always told myself, don’t let the SAF make use of us, in turn make use of what the SAF has to offer. True optimism comes from appreciation of whatever is thrown towards us.
Lifes pretty much on track, so guys don’t worry too much. I am pretty emotional at times when it comes to love, but lifes not always that perfect eh ;P
ill post more pictures after im done with GUARD DUTY. ;s oh well cya on monday morning!
No Pride.
Guess im out again, settling administrative stuff and just staying home … gotta go back later at about 10:30. Time seems to fly pretty fast, haven’t seen people i know for a long time, wheres my evil twin, wheres andyiano =( oh well everyone has their lives to live, and I am in a world of my own as well … Sometimes getting back into the civilian world seems to hurt me more that if i just remained in the military one, seeing my friends drift away from me one by one, its just heart wrenching. And to add on to the situation, I can’t seem to forget or let go of certain people … but then again its always good to have motivation from any source, especially when its NS … but oh well lets just play this life how it is suppose to be played and just suck it up and move on.
Anyway, if it even mattered, I’m “Medic Best Trainee”, whatever.
NIGHTNIGHT by DEDDY
